To Infinity and The Wand! The Magic Wand
It had been 11 days since I had excitedly hit “order now” on the Little Shop Of O’s website. After scouring reviews and seeing the celebrity appearance of the Magic Wand on many porn sites and sex toy shops, I decided to take the plunge and buy the gadget. The wand has been named one of the best personal massagers for the last 30 years and I was ready to be the judge of that! So as you can imagine, when my package arrived I moved from the front door to my locked bedroom in 2.5 seconds. I anxiously unwrapped the packaging already getting the downstairs tingles from pure anticipation of using it.
You gotta know one thing about my life, no matter how much I want something, the universe always finds a way to delay me. Today was no exception. I had pulled up a naughty little number on pornhub and as I started disrobing, my roommate busts into my room (hadn’t I locked the door?) blubbering about a man she was seeing who no longer wants to see her. It takes me a solid 25 minutes to calm her down and escort her out of my room. Girl problems always seem to wriggle in at the wrong moment. I suppose there’s never really a good moment to have a problem though. Alright, I’m ready again to start but now my dog won’t stop howling at the outside of my bedroom door. Alas, I let her in but kept my distance. I don’t know if that’s just me but animals in the same room while I masturbate is just creepy beyond belief. I always feel like I’m being judged for doing something wrong and that’ll always ruin the mood.
I turn the Magic Wand on, giggling at the surprising amount of vibration for it being the lowest level. I press play on my video and within 12 seconds of my self discovery journey, my dog throws up on my carpet. OF COURSE. This isn’t sexy! Far from it! I haven’t had sex in three months and the universe just really doesn’t want me having an orgasm. I cleaned up, kicked her out of my room and blared some bass jammin’ music. However, as luck would have it, it was a rainy day. Not just rainy. Torrential downpour was more like it. So you guessed it! The power went crashing down putting my count time of attempted ‘bation at around 40 minutes. Luckily after only a few minutes of messing with my house power box, electricity was back on and I was ready to be back in action!
With nothing but doubt in my mind and pissed as I am, I know perseverance is key if you want to succeed in life; so I proceed. Orgasm numero uno came within 34 seconds of turning on the wand. Woah…I power through the body numbing sensation that made me just a bit light headed and aimed for O number two. One minute and 45 seconds later it hit. Jolting my whole body into complete dream state. I became disorientated and weak as I fell back onto my bed and noticed immediately that a lamp light that wasn’t even turned on…was flickering with the power of the highest speed setting. The moment was an electrifying vision that made my sight go black and white while angelic musical notes sang down from the heavens in a harmony that only a damn good orgasm could create. Every annoying and trivial interruption I had had was completely and utterly worth it. I had never had a sexual peaking moment that affected me so voraciously. I wake up an hour later not even realizing I had gone to sleep. This magical Magic Wand literally had me passing out like a man after sex. This is what it must feel like to have a male orgasm!
Had it been easier to achieve the higher power that I so surprisingly found, I doubt the pleasure would’ve compared. I like to think that obstacles make for a greater reward. And lets face it…there’s no greater reward than the satisfaction of having the Magic Wand plugged in next to my bedside ’til the end of time.
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